How I Want to Die

Published by Chapster on 2003/7/7 (16280 reads)
How I Want to Die...

Tell me you love me.

Be Quiet

Turn down the lights (except for the candles), unless I ask otherwise. Keep bright lights out of my eyes.

Don't tell me I'm hallucinating. Learn from what I am telling you about the next life.

Play me music, softly. As I get nearer to death play music that de-emphasizes melody.

Tell me you love me.

I want to smell good things, I want to smell clean.

Put flowers, pictures, familiar quilts, comforting things near me.

If I am having trouble breathing, try a fan blowing gently in my face. Don't shake me, turn me, move me unless you first give me pain medicines and give them time to work.

Don't clean or move me just to clean or move me. Do these things only to relieve my suffering and keep loved ones near.

Don't force me to eat and drink unless I tell you I want to do so (I'm dying for God's sake!). Swabbing my mouth with a wet rag is fine. It feels good in fact. But, please, don't risk choking me. Living is not important enough to die choking. My body is increasingly unable to process these things. Also, and more importantly, as death draws near, I don't want them.

Dying is hard work. I'd like to have an atmosphere where I can do that without mindless distraction. Fidgeting and fussing don't help me. They raise my anxiety, not lower it. If I seem comfortable, let me be. Remember, I'm the one who's dying, not you. I need your attention. Please, just be with me...

Tell me you love me.

Give me my pain and anxiety medicine . Does it really matter if I get addicted?

Let me eat what I want, if I want it.

Remember that old question, "What would you want for your last meal?" This is the perfect opportunity to make sure I get it.

Tell me what you enjoyed about our lives together. Go through a scrapbook with me, show the people in the room our pictures. That way I'll know that even when I die, you'll still have me.

Tell me you love me!

Hold my hand; stay while you can.

But, know too, that I won't be okay with dying unless I know that you'll be okay with living.

Please, take care of yourself.

I Love You!

By Mike Davis

Tags: death   dying   support   intervention   process   good   things   do   Easing   to  

Thanks for visiting ElderHope!

Navigate through the articles
Previous article A Professor Gives His Last Lecture Easing the Dying Process Next article
The comments are owned by the poster. We aren't responsible for their content.
Poster Thread