Re: grief over losing a spouse, or beginning dementia?

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Quite a regular
From: Rowlett
Posts: 56
Hi Susan,
I am so very sorry for the loss of your husband and then your father. You asked if is normal to still be having a hard time coping with their deaths after 2 years.

I can only imagine that I and many others would still be dealing with grieving feelings years after the death of 2 close family members. Especially hard is that you say your husband's death was unexpected which makes the grieving process even more complicated.

I'm not sure how "hard" this time has been for you but if coping with your losses is still very painful, if it is keeping you from doing some activities that you would like to do if you didn't feel this badly, I might suggest you set up a visit with a grief counselor and/or a grief support group. You may want to call a Hospice in your community to get some names and referrals. All hospices should offer their own grief support group that would be open to others in the community. I am sure that your very first visit to a counselor or a group will let you know that after 2 years it can be normal to be still grieving. They can offer suggestions on how you might be able to cope with your grief in some ways that will help you over the next years.

Most importantly, please know that we all grieve in our own ways for our own reasons and that each person's grief is unique - what might be "normal" for one person might not be that for another. So, please seek some help with this if you can and also please know how very sad I am for your losses.

Please let us know if you need any other suggestions or information, Susan.

Please take care,
Barb - 4hope

Posted on 2012/5/21 13:54

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