Reply: You Name The Topic

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Re: another bad daughter
Posted by: Chapster Posted on: 2006/12/23 0:24
You're welcome...

That's what we're here for.

One other thought that may be of some help, which I haven't yet mentioned is that of journaling - basically as you have done here only over a longer period of time. Over the twelve years I worked in hospice care, the single most healing thing that bereaved folks did that helped the grief process was journaling. For some reason, the writing down of our thought processes, and then later reviewing those processes, or seeing where we've written the same thing for so long, etc. tends to help us 1) make sense of our experience, 2) get past the events of our experience and get to the heart of what we are thinking and where we need to go with it, and 3) to jog us to make changes where need be.

I remember when I was going through a rough personal time, I had written notes from therapy I had had some years before. When I returned to those notes five years later and realized that I was rationalizing in exactly the same way as I was five years previous, it gave me the push to set in motion permanent changes: "No way I want to be in the same place after another five years. I want to live." I made some difficult and very painful choices, but I'm glad I did. I'm not saying you need to make such choices. Only that journaling can give a different perspective than we might otherwise have.

I hope this helps in some way. Take care...