Reply: You Name The Topic

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Your thoughts
Posted by: 4Hope Posted on: 2002/5/8 22:38
Dear Arlene,
It is good to hear from you . . . however, I am sorry for your grief.

I'm not sure that I have ever heard a better way of phrasing what it feels like when we are going through a grieving process . . . that you are "sitting" with it, like a friend at the kitchen table - that is just beautiful!

After my father died in 1984, I remember thinking that this was the worst pain that a person could possibly experience. As I continued to work through my loss, I found that the feelings of pain changed also. Then, when my mother died years later, I revisited many of the same grief-related feelings, but of a different shape and nature. This was all a learning experience on many levels. However, by allowing myself to experience the harder feelings related to missing them so much, I also allowed myself the feelings of healing and growing through the loss. Marker dates, such as birthdays or the holidays, continue to tug at my heart - reminding me of the special connection that we shared and continue to share in a different way.

Thank you for sharing your thoughts . . . it sounds as though your journey through grief has illuminated areas in your own life, too. Please take care - and maybe, on Mother's Day, you can plan on honoring the place your mother shared in your life while celebrating the place you share in your children's life. Many blessings to you and your family, Arlene.